Leaving that, I spent some time this weekend in front of my minimalist fireplace with a notepad, trying to hear what I was being told from the inside.
Here is what I heard.
You have passed through the scariest part...you are still standing, still living, now learning what it will take.
You will always carry the marks, but you don't have to hold the anger or the fear. There may be life things, uncertain things, but you have the choice to be happy or not- live life wholeheartedly, or not. You are smart enough to know what you can do, and what you need help doing. Be brave. Ask. The universe wants to give you what you need for the journey. So, what will you take from this? What would you say if someone asked?
- Don't worry. This is the hardest thing. When you discover that the foundations of your life can be removed in an instant, it's easy to worry about every other thing that could possibly be taken away. The possibilities are endless, but the probabilities are few. Know you can handle whatever comes, but know that you cannot prevent it coming, anymore than you can prevent the world turning. Let go of worry and find peace.
- Love yourself. When you think you are unloveable, wrap yrour arms around yourself, figuratively or literally and know that you are worthy. Your circumstances have not changed your capacity to love or be loved.
- Bear in mind what you can control and what you cannot. You actually can control very little. You can control yourself but you cannot control the actions or thoughts of anyone else. In the end you must let go. Surrender. If you do, you will find peace.Be present. There is no point in trying to relive the past in a different version. Every moment you spend moving the furniture of the past around in your mind is a moment you have lost living in the present. Look forward, always, but live now.
- Be hopeful. Full of hope. Without hope there is no looking forward. Wake up each morning with a sense of hope and you will be surprised at the events and people who are put in your path to move you forward. Expect it.
- Live in gratitude. All of the blessings in your life are gifts, not givens.
- Ask for help. You know your pool, your car and the leaky toilet? Yes, those things. You are pretty bright, but you are also human. Get help for the things you can't work out on your own. There isn't a person who knows everything or who can do everything. You are no exception.
- Accept yourself. Some people will love you, some will hate you and some will just not get you full stop. Still, be proud of who and what you are, as it evolves. No one can understand you until you understand yourself. Accept it. Accept all of it...the neat and tidy, the messy and unpredictable. Those who love you will travel with you and those who don't, well, send them your live and wish them well.
So, this is incomplete because I'm sure that there is much I have to learn, but I think these things are a good start.
